"Nothing prepares you for it," our friend Wally, father of three, concurred when I told him that I had once thought that I was physically, mentally and emotionally ready for all the hard work that goes with caring for the baby. "What was I thinking?" our neighbour Trish asked herself on the early weeks they brought their second child Jonathan home from the hospital. 

What would I do without these disposable diapers? This box lasts us a month. Costs $36 at Sam's Club (a bargain!). Had to take it back though since it was too small for Evan already. Our baby at 16 weeks.

It makes me smile when I hear/read comments of "finally, nakaraos na rin siya" (she's done with it) from non-parents when told of somebody they know having given birth. Hon, that's just the beginning. In fact, from the time you get that confirmation from the doctor that you're pregnant is also saying goodbye to the life you are familliar and comfortable (very) with. It's a long, tough (and it actually gets tougher after birth - not during or before) road ahead.

Indeed it becomes a little easier once you have a settled baby (could happen from from 2 weeks to 3 months) but you are still far from your normal self, time and again you would long for your old, more relaxing routine of the bygone pre-baby days. Heck, I just want my 8 hours of straight sleep. Nowadays, even with my baby sleeping through the night, I would be very lucky if I had four (my average is 3 straight hours). As my boss wrote to me in an email, she only got "herself" back this year. Her son is 5 years old.

Life is more hectic that I have gone back to work. My schedule is so tight I couldn't believe that even sitting down for 5 minutes in front of the computer is practically impossible. Not unless I want to sacrifice my sleep hours, that is. A sample of what a week day is like:

6:15 - nurse Evan (but I am usually awake by 5:30)
6:45 - dress Evan up, put feeding bottles in his milk bag, prepare my lunch, prepare breast pump accessories, put one or 2 or Evan's toys.
7:00 - dress myself up
7:15 - put Evan in buggy, walk to car, put Evan in car, put 2 bags in car, put buggy at the trunk of the car.
7:30 - drop off Evan to day care   
8:00 to 4:30 - work
4:45 - pick up Evan from day care
5:00 - do errands
5:30 - home, play with Evan
5:45 - prepare feeding bottles for washing, transfer breastmilk to feeding bottle, prepare dinner (if possible) while entertaining Evan at the same time
6:15 - Evan's massage/exercise/tummy time
6:30 - nurse Evan
6:45 - Tom arrives from work
7:00 - prepare dinner while Tom bottlefeeds Evan, prepare Evan's meals for next day while Tom entertains Evan
8:00 - Evan's bathtime, prepare his bathwater, lay out the towel, undress him, bath, diaper, lotion, dress him up.
8:30 - eat dinner while Evan naps (if we get lucky that is, half the time we eat dinner with one hand while bouncing the bouncer with another, or keep handing him toys. Did I tell you about shushing and chewing at the same time?)
9:00 - nurse Evan, Tom pays the bill, cleans the litterbox, throws out the trash
9:30 - Tom bottlefeeds Evan, I put away Evan's bath paraphenalia, I take a shower, prepare clothes for the next day, prepare Evan's things, prepare Evan's room (adjust the blinds, put water in humidifier)
10:00 - sleep as Tom puts Evan to bed (fingers eternally crossed)

And this is on a very good day when everything is smoothsailing. In fact on days like these I could squeeze in one or two househould chores like laundry or vacuuming. But if Evan is gassy and wouldn't feed well, or fretful and wouldn't sleep right away that usually means 30 minutes or 1 hour setback. That's a good baby for you. 

I'm betting it'll even get more fun during winter.

Peter Should Have Been His Middle Name

Last weekend night, Tom and I toasted to our 3rd year anniversary over at a really good Tapas place, a hip spanish restaurant a short drive from our home. He had merlot while mine was a sangria. Evan was there to celebrate it with us too. He had milk.

Having a baby does add another dimension to marriage. It's true what they say about babies making a strong marriage stronger and could break a weak one. I truly get that now.

It is interesting how with Evan coming we have experienced a reversal of personalities. Tom is the calm person while I have become a bundle of nerves. More than ever he has become my rock and the voice of reason to my, most of the time, needless mommy worries. Having Evan and as every mommy feels that most of the burden in caring for the baby lies with her I even get to appreciate more Tom's burden in providing for his family.

We get less cuddle time nowadays, have practically put our weekend movie nights on hold indefinitely, having a baby also means us "working at home" on shifts but the warm aura of love that envelopes the three of us while we fondly watch our son, be it doing milestones or the most ordinary thing like sleeping, is enough to make up for the lessened physical togetherness.

Most Awful Song

Has any of you heard that new song "The Picture" by Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow? The first time I heard it on the radio I thought it was a joke or a poorly made commercial (reminds me of Pall Mall cigarette jingles and the like). And I thought nothing could be worse than Nickelback.

Food For Thought

"The cost of raising a child in the US is $1.45 million for middle-income family raising a child to age 22 (for higher income it's $2.78 / $761,871 for lower income) . And this doesn't include the extras like "soccer camp, cello lessons and SAT prep."

-Figures based on US Dept of Agriculture

Currently listening to: Liz Fair "Extraordinary"
Currently reading: Parenting Mag (October Issue)
Currently watching: Good Night And Good Luck (George Clooney)